.: LELANOPHILUS.NET :.

I was in Colorado last week and one morning I put on my shoes and padded around for a while getting ready in the morning. I felt something in one of my shoes, kind of like maybe some lint from the drier had stuck to my sock and was rolled up at my toes. It was kind of uncomfortable so finally I sat down and took off my shoe to find what had gotten stuck in it. I shook it out and this is what I saw:



The little guy thought that my shoe would be a good place to sleep. It does have a nice ambiance to it, I s'pose.



Until he got CRUSHED TO DEATH. By my FOOT.

About a week ago I went into the bathroom to blow my nose. I almost opened up the stall to get some toilet paper but then decided that paper towel would be fine. So I blew my nose and then left the bathroom. Now, the bathroom by my work is teeny tiny. Somehow they've squeezed a urinal in there. Because it is so small, you feel like you should turn off the light when you exit. So I turned off the light as a I left the bathroom.

And then I heard an angry shout. "HEY. TURN THAT BACK ON." I was already halfway out the door and as I turned to comply he shouted again. "HEY." Very angry. I said, "Sorry! I didn't know anybody was in there!" as I quickly flipped the light back on.

Gosh, right! Imagine if I'd tried to open the stall door. That guy was in a mood.

Anyway, now what I do is I sit in the bathroom stall quietly. Alone with my thoughts. In the dark. Then, when someone comes in and turns on the light I shout, "HEY. TURN THAT BACK OFF. WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING."

I know what you're thinking. "Does he really?" Well, I guess you'll just have to come by the bathroom nearest my work and see for yourself. Imagine that I said that last sentence there coyly.

This morning I dreamed that I was in Australia with my mother and my sisters Heather and Ashleigh. It was pretty awesome because we stepped into a building through a window, but gravity was perpendicular inside the building so you had to step in and then kind of lean sideways and then stand up on the wall. That was the most awesome part of the dream and I probably should've saved it for last, but there you go.

I noticed two things in particular about the Australians while I was there. The first was that hardly anybody had an accent. I don't remember being particularly surprised by this. I think I likened it to all the people who say they're from the south who lack an awesome accent and then just ignored it.

The other thing was how incredibly RUDE Australians are. I got two drinks from drinking fountains and MAYBE I took a bit longer to get a drink than I should have (I was thirsty guys) but that doesn't give a person the right to just push me out of the way. Which, I might, and in fact will, add, is what the Australians did to me. Classy.

Also, Ashleigh had her dress on inside out. It was pretty obvious because the collar was all backwards and had fabric that should've been hidden sticking out all over the place. Also, there were little pins all throughout the dress holding it together. See, if she'd put it on right they would've been invisible. I guess she might have been skewered by 'em and maybe that is why she didn't put it on inside in.

I found myself bored during a meeting with a pencil in my hand.



I like the sun and the watch. I especially like the little bug saying "BZ". I think it is rather avant-garde of him to only use one "Z". Maybe it's a European bug though. Which, I don't have to tell you, isn't so cool.

I wonder who can correctly identify all of the things in this sketch.

So, guys, have you ever tried a Jonagold apple? Tell you what, you should. You want to know why? I'll tell you why. 'Cause it's delicious.

I found myself not paying attention during a recent natural language processing meeting. This is the result.



I think my favorite is the happy little bowler hat. I'd also like to draw your attention to the fact that everybody has pupils.

Saturday morning I argued with my roommate for about an hour about the legalization of marijuana. I felt pretty bad afterward because it wasn't really a friendly dispute.

It pretty much boiled down to these two arguments:

Marijuana should be legal because adults that use it are only affecting themselves and people should be free to exercise their agency. Once a person is an adult they should be able to choose for themselves and reap the consequences eternally of the decisions they make that don't affect other people.

Marijuana should not be legal because it leads to crime and the church is opposed to the use of drugs. That is, we should vote according to what we believe to be right and wrong in order to make the punishment for sin more immediate and to help people choose the right.

I think that is a pretty fair summation. Anyway, I've decided that if I ever get into another political debate I am giving myself a time limit of fifteen minutes. Then I stop talking and go do more productive things.